Tuesday, April 7, 2009

I have to get used to this

One of my affirmations is "I am in love with how I look!" That feels like a lie right now. I look at the photos and I only see the flaws. But since I've posted my pictures here and on my facebook pages, people are saying that I look nice. My mom was blown away! She hasn't seen me in a photo since 2000. A friend wants me to model. HA! I only have a few good angles for photos right now. (Cancel that, cancel that!) "I Donni, can accept people looking at me." That is so uncomfortable for me, but I have to acknowledge that I do want people to see me and to like how I look. I haven't allowed that in for so long. I hear the words "vanity", "sinful", "proud" and they keep me from being appreciative for how I do look. I AM GORGEOUS FOR GOD! I am his creation and I am perfect! Now I feel like I need to be gorgeous for me. Baby steps, baby steps, baby steps. It feels good to think "I can't F*** this up!" "I can't go backwards" It all feels like I am truly on the right path and it is only going to be more amazing, more miraculous and more loving.

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